| Location | Whyalla, South Australia |
| Age | 45 years |
| Cause of Death | Suicide |
| Date of Birth | 22/12/1954 |
| Date of Death | 18/03/2000 |
| Visitors | 618 since 31/03/2008 |
| Creator |
My special Father, Trevor Wayne Hansen, Blessed with knowledge beyond what i have ever seen...
Dad, you were born on the 22nd Day Of December 1954, I still live with the agonizing pain and broken
heart that you placed inside me by taking your life on that fateful day, Saturday, the 18th Day Of
March 2000...
You were never perfect, but noone on this earth is are they? You were a great Dad, All i ever wanted
was your time... No money, No cars, Nothing but your time and love is all i needed to feel great!
You were well known in Whyalla, South Australia...
I know you were a broken man who lived an extremely difficult life, You lost your mum, my Nanna when
you were 23 years old, you had a really rough upbringing and i know Nanna was your world of peace
in all the pain...
I know my mum hurt you bad, your writing expresses the hurt and the sense of loss that she gave to
you, I'm sorry for all she put you through, Dad, really I am.
You moved on later and we all know what it was in the end that was the last straw for you, I hate
the fact that you were treated as you were, I was there everyday and seen what was going on with my
own eyes.
You never deserved that! And we have all lost out on you because of it, I have so much rage inside!
That Saturday, Dad, is a memory that haunts the core of my very being! Words will never express that
pain... I was only 17years old, Dad.... *Tears*
Words also will never express the pain, emptiness and anger that i hold that you are not here
watching your Grandchildren grow and flourish... They will Always know of their Pape, I remember
telling you i would get my kids to call you that when i was a teen and you did not like that 'Pape'
bit at all! So that is apart of your punishment for not staying.
To most, Dad, you were a very hard man. Noone wanted to cross the wrong side of you.
To me you were a beautiful inspiration with the most amazing morals that i'm so proud you taught to
me...
You know mum (Tracey Hansen) took her life on the 28th Day Of April 2004... I'm sure you have both
worked things out in the kingdom of Heaven, which you both were wed to the Lord...
I Miss You! *Tears*
I'll never get to give you dead legs or dead arms again, i miss that rough playfighting with you...
I even miss the lectures!!!! I'm sure you never thought i would!!!!....
Well, I do....
I miss the adventurous person you were, you loved the simple things,... Camping, exploring the
Flinders Ranges, Mining, anything that was out in the wild!
Love you Dad...My ol' man!
Always your Princess,
I will never let you go... Xxxx Please watch over my Family!
"Every step i take, every move i make
Every single day, everytime i pray i'll be missing you...
Thinking of the day, when you went away,
what a soul to take, what a bond to break,.. i'll be missing you"
(Missing you,
Puff Daddy)
For your
personal wake Dad Xxxx
"Don't leave me in all this pain... Don't leave me out in the rain,
come back and bring back your smile, come and chase these tears away,
I need your arms, to hold me again, the nights are so unkind
Bring back those nights when i held you beside me...
Unbreak my heart.... say you love me again,...
undo all this hurt that you caused when you walked out the door and walked out of my life... uncry
these tears... ive cried so many nights...
Unbreak my heart.....
(Unbreak my heart, Toni Braxton)
In Memory of Michael F & Trevor H, Love Naomilee
Rumors & bulls**t
Hey Dad, I get contacted from one of my half sisters only to be abused over my name!
After 10 years, Wow! glad that none of it bothered me! I was more disappointed to be contacted over something so irrelevant!
Everyone who knew you and Tracey knew that Naomilee Patricia was the name you had chosen for me!I was your first daughter! Of course you would want to honor your mother!
It was not your fault that Tracey decided to be difficult and go the other way at the last minute..So I did what we spoke about before you passed away and I had my name legally changed!!what we discussed was reassuring I was doing the right thing for my true identity!
The things we sat and spoke about for hours on end in the 6 months before you died was a real eye opener!
I could not believe what you had been through!
Those memories are what noone can ever take from me!
These days I have long ditched the toxic abusing people in my life!
They are so low and pathetic it makes you wonder how boring and unsuccessful their own lives are for them to go around making fake claims of other people!
They are also so low that they build this world in their pathetic minds that they are the victims when infact it is their own guilty concise doing it!!
I mean, s**t, they cant tell me to my face can they?? They must of loved the fact that I was left in the dark, in total limbo wondering what on earth I had done wrong... well I had the last laugh and no matter what they try do I always will!
I am stronger and wiser! Thanks for your wisdom dad, just like that night in front of all your bros you told them if they ever want to find you, they will in me cos I have your heart. How emotional that was dad. That was a really emotional night, I will never forget everything we shared between beers or brews.
I have been accused of so many things, even sleeping with my own uncle!!! :O how disgusting! LOL I had to laugh at that!! I helped my uncle out cos he was on his own with 3 kids and depressed, and he is family! He came and stayed with my then partner and I in our home and that is what I get for it!
I would help him out all over again if I had to cos at the end of the day that is what family does!!! Apparently not this one..
The following are the rumors that I have heard of, God knows what else is out there, nothing ceases to amaze me anymore!
Jealous people! With sick twisted heads! Sad!...
I have an amazing family, gorgeous children, an amazing husband and the best friends a woman could aske for! I have respect from alot of people and Im blessed!!!!
I am getting so strong emotionally, spiritually and mentally to from all the scarring!
I love you Dad and we love it when you come visit us all the time and make it known you are there!!
Continued.......
cont..rumors!!!
Aparrently I ..
1- I shaved your head after you died!! WTF? How sick! I cut a lock of your hair,little did they know but I was the last one to see you before your coffin was locked down in front of me and then taken,
your ashes have a part of me in them forever no matter where they are, the lock of hair I cut from my hair and put in with other certain things,also the letter. The items I placed in are spiritual.
I could never picture you with a shaved head!!! Omg that would not be my father!
2- Apparently I took EVERYTHING from your house!
I managed 2 small backpacks of things, including your holey track pants and ripped shirts, they meant alot to me! You had personally gave me a picture the night you took your life. I also managed to get hold of a couple more pictures of you. Big deal!! You were my father after all..
Out of all the money grabbing items, Im glad I went for your broken reading glasses!!
I also as you know went back and took your armchair that a certain person had decided would be going to the dump!
Oh.. I also saved your dog who ended up passing away in 2005!! Problem??
3- I trashed your house!!
WTF would I do that for?? I seen your ex trash the loungeroom the night she entered it. pulling the tv out of the cabinet etc, was that my problem? No, it was hers! This was after she told me that you had contacted her the night you took your life telling her your intentions and she hung up on you.. She said she didnt think you were serious.. That's her problem not mine...
A "mate" of yours threw a beer bottle through a bedroom window and your aloe vera plant was booted across the front yard.. disrespectful!
4 - Im a junkie.. Hmmm well will admit that I smoked ridiculous amounts of weed as a teen and into my early 20's! I am now a very occasional smoker of it!
I have not tried speed, trips, ecstasy, heroin and what ever the f**k else there is out there in all my near 27 years!I had enough of living around druggies as a kid! So im quite happy just to get drunk!
5 - I murdered my daughter...
If I did, I would be in jail! This is a sick thing to say! Nikayla died in my arms of aspiration, if I could have her here with me right now, I would!
Nikayla spend in hospital around 8 whole months out of 2 years & 2 months of her life, she was sick & had to have operations & monitoring. I stayed in the hospital in Adelaide with her, but when she was in hospital in Whyalla I did not like to be there at night,it freaked me out, when she was settled for the night i'd go home and hit the bottle, it was all I could do! same the next day, go up in the morning, come home at night and hit the bottle, until she came home!!(which was ALOT better for us!)
What a sick thing for someone to say!Pathetic! Low lifes!
How boring their lives must truly be! How I wish they had a brain to think with,a heart to feel with!
6 - When you died I was going to "kidnap" my half siblings! LOL omg another load of sh*t..
when you died dad, as you know, I had the 3 kids with me, they were devastated as was I and they hadn't seen their mother for a while.. They did not want to leave Whyalla or me and my then partner..
I merely mentioned that if it was what the mother felt ok with that I would be more than happy for them to stay with me for a while.. Wow! I never knew offering help was seen as such a harsh act! Me?? a 17yr old kidnapping 3 kids.... grow a brain!!!!
I love you Dad! Always ya Bugga & Princess Naomilee Patricia Xxxx ♥
Another Year
Hi Dad,
I just wanted to write to you here to let you know that yes, another year has gone now since you took yourself away from me....
I didn't cry this time once....
No I'm not "getting over it"
I just wanted to try be a hard arse. You know the song by Rhianna that I sing to you called "cry" well it is true and it fits perfectly with today also aswel as every day!
I am drunk, I am mad at you , I hate what you have done to me and you miss out on my kids, your grand children, also your son inlaw, also LIFE on earth where you were meant to stay...
I need to go dad,
This is too hard, I can't even leave Nikayla, Jaylei or Paul a candle right now, let alone all the other special Angels.
I feel so bad for that, what is the private message I got about on here from some person talking about inheriting things into my country!!!! WTF????
What a nice place to suck sh*t out of the vulnerable!!!!
Hmmmmmmmm........
Anyway I am not going to email that moron, for scam reasons that are plain to see for a stranger to come on here and dribble this sh*t to me, I don't need it!
I love you Daddy!
Always forever!
Love ya Princess, I WILL NOT cry!!!!
Always ya bugga! Xxxx Xxxx Xxxx Xxxx
Christmas Without You Again Xxxx
Dad, I feel I can let go of the 'happy face' wit you and cut the sh*t and tell you how it is....
Im hurting....
Having Cody here has been a blessing this year and especially for our first Christmas together in 11 years but I've been crying inside alot today.... Everything has been bittersweet.
I have tried to focus on the meaning of today so much but it slips from my mind whenever I get a hint of a reminder of what I am missing so bad.
That star last night dad was amazing! Just like you always told me. I was in awe!
I wanna scream out the top of my lungs now dad as I drink the liquid that is a release for me, I want to scream WHY WHY WHY WHY until I have no air left to scream and no voice for sound....
I want to shed all the built up tears ive kept hidden today and I know I will have enough to water all the beautiful roses....
I want to punch something so hard... and have it shatter to pieces to represent what my heart is like....
just want to scream....
In the silence of the night for all the neighborhood to hear in the stillness and as the clouds depart of the moon as it glistens on the tears falling form my tired forsaken eyes.... I feel forsaken by you Dad...
You let me down....
I want you home... but you have gone home, too soon....
I am mother sister and father to your son, Dad, he needs me so much and I need him too....
I just miss you, so much!
I know you were here in someway today and still are no doubt.
Always in my heart father of mine. I do appreciate the blessings I carry with me today...
It has been those blessings that sometimes only shimmer in the distant light that are open and focused today, right here, right now....
Through the pain....
Through the tears... The gift the Lord gave to me.
Thank you so much for introducing Jesus to my life Dad...
I am really understanding....
I love you, we all do so much! Always ya Bugga!
Love your Princess Naomilee
Xxxx
Xxxx
Xxxx
Xxxx
Merry Christmas Dad, I know you rest with the Lord.
We Love You Dad! Happy Birthday!
This is your Son Cody Luke:
Dear Dad,
I'll always love you heaps and I miss you that much, I'm thinking of ya.
When I go to bed to sleep I'm always teary, and it breaks my feelings that much.
Love Always your boy Cody XXXXOOOO
P.s Hurts so bad Dad!
This is your Daughter Naomilee:
Dear Dad,
It is another birthday without you and I wish you were here to celebrate it.
It is hard to just light a candle for you and have your picture there to look at, instead of seeing you in person and giving you a dead arm and joking around with you.
Words will never express my grief and I hope you watch over us Always Forever and never leave us Dad.
Happy Birthday, Miss you and always ya bugga!
Love your Princess, Naomilee Xxxx
This is from your Son-In-Law Michael:
Happy Birthday Trev, thinking of you today, Cheers, Your Son-In-Law ((((Hugs))))----*Handshakes* LOL
This is from your Granddaughter Maleiya on behalf of her, Ditanyia & Tejay:
Dear Pape,
I love you, Happy Birthday. We miss you lots, Love Maleiya Xxxx
WE ALL MISS YOU!!!!!!!!
Xxxx Xxxx Xxxx Xxxx
Look At Them!
Dad,
Look at your beautiful grandchildren, Maleiya trying to read a book to Ditanyia while Ditanyia sits with her watching Land Before Time and Tejay sits on another couch rocking to your song playing from here "Missing You" then puts his finger in his mouth to look at his sisters and see what they are on about then he starts chewing his finger to help him teethe while he watches the movie, now he has gone over to his sisters to see what trouble he can get into and now over to me to try say "Oi, pick me up mama" now he is trying to get into your cabinet! See that CHEEKY look with the tongue out when I told him NO??? The girls are still reading, Maleiya is trying so hard, they are all three up on the same couch now, oh dad I WISH you could come and tickle them, or help me and Michael pull them into line you big softy! Maleiya is here now and says:
Dear Pape,
I like you so much and I love you so much because you are my beautiful Grandpa in the whole world and I like writing letters to you. I also like your own dog Fatboy who is up in Heaven with you. I thank you for God pape, and I also don't want to lose any animals, I want to look after them for God, I think they are so pretty, the animals are so good and some goats climb and some go rock climbing on a mountain, the babied have to learn.
I love you pape, Bye, I love you, Love Maleiya xoxoxox
Dad, why do you have to be up there? Why can't you be here to look at Maleiya when she talks to you?
Ditanyia is up here as you know, it all breaks my heart, just like the song now playing on here "Cry" by Rihanna. I miss you so much and i'm sick of not having you around, grief to me feels like a disease I wish I didn't have but I have to live with it, I don't want to have to. I wish I never knew. It hurts, and I want it to end!!!!
Love you so much Dad, always. Even if I am the only one on here who lights candles for you I don't care, I need to keep you alive somehow.
Love you, give your son-in-law, who you should be here to give a good yarn to a hug ok, let him feel you, I think he is confused and I want you to show him the ropes, show him and teach him all the things he wants to know about on top of his high intelligence, you know how to do it, I know you do, don't always come through me, come on your own to him so he can see the difference. Let him meet the dad of the woman he says he wants to be with for the rest of his life, the mother of his children - me. Please do that for me dad,
I love you, Always your Bugga,
Your Princess Naomilee, P.s. bet ya glad about the name change this year/start of next year hehe F*ck it, I love ya!!! I LOVE YA!!!!!! I LOVE YOU!!!!!!!!!!!
I scream for you so much! Xxxx Xxxx Xxxx Xxxx Xxxx Xxxx Xxxx Xxxx
Questions....
Hey Dad,
I don't understand this world we live in....
People always seem to think looking on the 'positive' side is the way through life, I must disagree.... Maybe i'm a pessimist, but maybe i'm more open to wounds of human kind than the naive people around me...
What ever happened to true genuineness? I know many people have it in them, but it is how they seem to use it....
It is not a worthy statement of kindness with randomness in hopes of a wish to come true, that in it's own is fake genuineness in my eyes....
One person told me once, "I do kind things for people so later I know when I need something done I will have it done".... Now that statement in it's own is basically doing "Good will" to people who really reach out and need it, but at the same time those people feel obliged to give in return...
It makes me sick... I believe in the "You scratch my back, i'll scratch yours" but within reason....
People in general think for themselves, this world is decaying beyond repair to get any value out of anything in life without it costing a chunk of yours....
Yes, Dad, nothing is meant to come easily, correct.... this is my point... there is no "working together"
Family values seem to go out the window and family events take place for a reason only, not out of sincerity, out of "something that HAS to be done"
I hate it, I don't understand the representation of "Family" Why bother if it is just reputation and "Doing the right thing" yet, not in it with the heart and love....
I'm tired of seeing certain family members that are so caught up in their own sh*t that they let there loved ones part their lives, due to their own ignorance! It is overwhelming!!!! Then when the coffin is displayed them people wonder why things were so pear shaped and look at people to blame, when really they have no-one to blame but their own bitterness and ignorance....
It is appalling! It is repulsive!
Be real! Be up front! or Fu*k off!!!!
like you said....
"Say what you mean & mean what you say!" How true!!!!
Love you Dad, in my heart till we meet again, Always ya Bugga,
Your Princess Naomilee Xxxx Xxxx Xxxx Xxxx
Thanks for teaching me well Father! Keepin' it REAL!
Father's Day
Hey Dad,
Another Father's Day without your arms to hold me,
Another Father's Day where I write to you but can't see your face while you read...
Another painful reminder that I'll never share Another Father's Day with you...
My heart aches, I have no will to do today,
Im glad I can help your Grand kids celebrate for their beautiful Daddy,
But it leaves me aching and drains my emotion to blank and numb that I cant hear you say "Thank you my Princess"
I miss you so much....
I don't know what else to say right now except, im grateful that you would take Michael into our family with pure honesty and be so genuine, I wish I could say the same about his Mother in particular....
Anyway, We had a drink for you as you know last night and onya for helping Michael skull that 660ml bottle!!!! that was a blast!
Put all aside and visit Pop Jack in hospital if he is there or at home to let him know you are around....
Love you with all my heart Dad,
Love Your Princess
Naomilee Patricia
Xxxx Xxxx
With Love,.... Your Princess.... (Journal Entry 4th march 2008)
Did you rock me in your arms?
Did you sing to me sweetly?
Was I pure beauty in your eyes?
------------ Did you imagine me...
----------------------As I am now?....
----------Was you proud?
Did you ever wonder what I would become?...
Did you ever have dreams for me?
----------------....Why?....--------------
------------Do I carry your anger?-----------
----------Also your heart and wisdom?-------
---------------Why am i wise beyond my years?
Yet im still judged by my incapabilities....
-----------------------Am I just like you?....
-----------Wish you were here--------
Thinking of you Always! Xxxx
JUST SHOWING I CARE
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·.♥.·°.°·. ♥.·°.°·.♥.·°.. ♥
☆ *
☆ * ☆* ☆ *☆ * ☆ * Sweet dreams Angel
* ☆ *
☆ * ☆ *☆ * ☆ * ~x~x~x~x~x~x~x~
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